DISCLAIMER:  I believe in allowing people to spend their money as they see fit.  I also reserve the right to question their judgment.  I believe that if one makes an incredibly bizarre financial decision that it’s only reasonable for them to expect that someone will comment upon it.  I do not hate the wealthy.  I am not filled with a sick green envy of the uber-rich.  I would never argue that a legal product of any sort should be yanked from the marketplace because I perceive it as stupid.

Why the disclaimer?  Because it seems like all sorts of weird side arguments pop up when people talk about the Visa Black Card and I just wanted to make my overall perspective clear before laughing writing about it.

The Visa Black Card, issued by Barclay’s, is a black, carbon graphite credit card designed to compete with American Express’ Centurion Card (which is made of some secret alloy mined on Mars or something).  It’s a high-limit card marketed to the high-income crowd (and those who want to pretend to be part of that crowd).  It has a few selling points.  One of them is the “cool” factor, also known as the silly seeking of over-the-top status symbols that make one appear to be a mega-jerk.

The card itself? Big limit.  Interest rate at 9.9% plus prime.  A 1% cash back for $1=1 point reward program.  You also get occasional random “luxury gifts”, some nice travel benefits and a 24/7/365 concierge service.

The annual fee? $495.

So, for $500 you can get a card that doesn’t have the world’s greatest interest rate and  that has a rather ho-hum rewards program.  Not a great deal.  You can do better.

When I first started paying attention to the black cards and the weird status-seeking creepiness that seemed to go along with them, I thought about that “I Am Rich” iPhone app.  That was the $1,000 application you could buy for your iPhone that did nothing but display a spinning jewel and the message, “I Am Rich”.  Believe it or not, eight people bought that damn thing.

I was ready to write off the Visa Black Card as just another hollow status item desiged to get the “more cents than sense” crowd excited.

The more I read about it, though, the more I realized that there is a small semgnet of the population who might actually be able to use the card in a manner that justified the extreme annual fee and the other dreawbacks of the card.

That’s because of the concierge service.  Having the black card is sort of like having your own concierge on staff.  It’s a great way to get things done and I can understand how someone living a remarkably upscale lifestyle could perceive the benefit as worthwhile.  AdSavvy does a good job of explaining:

Makes sense. For the ultra-rich, buying whatever you want can get boring; they need the ability to actually do something that other people can’t. A good concierge can do that. You need 12 Arabian horses for your daughters wedding?  Call up the concierge, he’ll have them flown in from Dubai. You need a personalized and autographed copy of Richard Dawkin’s The Selfish Gene for your son’s birthday, call up the concierge. The ability to get difficult things done is what sets these cards apart from just a card with a very high limit. Just the knowledge that cardholders have that ability, 24-hours a day, keeps them happy. And that’s what makes this niche so profitable.

I gotta tell you, though, it’s hard for me to take those benefits as seriously as I should when I see so many goobers who behave like Patrick Bateman’s (American Psycho) without the serial killing problem lusting after a tiny piece of carbon graphite.  For better or for worse, the black card really is “I Am Rich” for the wallet instead of the iPhone.

If you drop tens of thousands of bucks on your Visa every year and feel the need to be a big shot or have an actual use for a constantly-available concierge, consider the Visa Black card.

And don’t worry if you’re not really in the states “top 1%” category Visa likes to reference.  People who aren’t necessarily  the best credit risks in the world are getting invitations, too.  I doubt Visa will let that get out of hand, though.  The whole selling point of the card is its exclusivity and the won’t want to blow that.